Auditions for HI/DI/Duo will be on Wednesday, September 4, 2019, beginning immediately after school in the speech/debate room. You must perform a 1 minute cutting from the dramatic monologue and a 1 minute cutting from the comedic monologue. You may cut as you see fit. You may also interweave a balanced cutting of the dramatic/comedic monologues to make a full 2 minute uninterrupted monologue. Selected script/s may be presented to you at auditions for you to perform a cold reading. Final cast list for the HI/DI/Duo will be posted on Friday, September 6, 2019, at the conclusion of school.
Audition - Female
Dramatic
My Consciousness Is Drowsy
Author: Joseph Arnone
In the monologue, My Consciousness Is Drowsy, Patti talks about how she has been taking life for granted and needs to dial back and show thanks.
Patti: I wish I could get away from myself.
I’ve been complaining and whining so much lately, that I’m literally on my own nerves. I had no idea I was such a whiny witch. I’d like to kick my own back side if I could.
You know what it is…I’ve become so ungrateful with what I have in my life. There are many people less fortunate than me and here I am grouchy and miserable and I can’t stand myself anymore. (beat) This isn’t who I am…deep down, I swear, this isn’t really me.
I have the most amazing man in my life, my parents are alive and well, my siblings are all doing great…and I moan…I can’t stand people who moan.
How do I break free from myself?
I wish I can leave who I am and go somewhere new, somewhere alone and quiet, somewhere where I can listen to the rain, the ocean’s waves, somewhere where I can hold hands with the wind and forget about my own existence…long enough to get back to who I need to be.
Can you help me? Can you show me how?
*posted with edits to the original monologue
Author: Joseph Arnone
In the monologue, My Consciousness Is Drowsy, Patti talks about how she has been taking life for granted and needs to dial back and show thanks.
Patti: I wish I could get away from myself.
I’ve been complaining and whining so much lately, that I’m literally on my own nerves. I had no idea I was such a whiny witch. I’d like to kick my own back side if I could.
You know what it is…I’ve become so ungrateful with what I have in my life. There are many people less fortunate than me and here I am grouchy and miserable and I can’t stand myself anymore. (beat) This isn’t who I am…deep down, I swear, this isn’t really me.
I have the most amazing man in my life, my parents are alive and well, my siblings are all doing great…and I moan…I can’t stand people who moan.
How do I break free from myself?
I wish I can leave who I am and go somewhere new, somewhere alone and quiet, somewhere where I can listen to the rain, the ocean’s waves, somewhere where I can hold hands with the wind and forget about my own existence…long enough to get back to who I need to be.
Can you help me? Can you show me how?
*posted with edits to the original monologue
Comedic
Thank You So Much
Author: Joseph Arnone
In this monologue, Helen is the most annoying woman ever born, however, she is completely and utterly sincere and genuine with everything she says.
HELEN: Thank you…thank you so much. No, no, really…thank you. I thank you so much for what you have done. You are the best. You are stupendous. You are the greatest ever. Thank you. I truly need you to know how grateful I am and just how amazingly thankful I am to you. Thank you. Without you this never would have happened. Thank you. This life, this moment, everything in it, this incredible experience; so gratifying and dreamlike…thank you. You made this happen. You made this all come true. Without you my life would be crap. Nothing. Zilch. Nada. Zero. Invisible. Absolutely boring. Thank you. No, really, thank you. Thank you so much for all you have done for me. Thank you for being you, you perfect person you, you perfect human being person you, THANK YOU. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, the top of my heart and everything around my heart, everything inside my heart, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you…so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so (she loses her breath, gasps for air but regains control after a quick cough) ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so……..MUCH. You are remarkable. A gem. Special. Generous. Beyond words. Beyond what is beyond and then, what is even beyond that. An angel, a saint…you are Godlike. Really, no, no…you are the most wonderful creature ever created to exist on planet Earth.
Thank you. Just thought you should know…thanks again…thank you. Truly. (whispers) Thank you. (points)You. You. (softest whisper) Thank you. (mouthing the words) Thank you.
Author: Joseph Arnone
In this monologue, Helen is the most annoying woman ever born, however, she is completely and utterly sincere and genuine with everything she says.
HELEN: Thank you…thank you so much. No, no, really…thank you. I thank you so much for what you have done. You are the best. You are stupendous. You are the greatest ever. Thank you. I truly need you to know how grateful I am and just how amazingly thankful I am to you. Thank you. Without you this never would have happened. Thank you. This life, this moment, everything in it, this incredible experience; so gratifying and dreamlike…thank you. You made this happen. You made this all come true. Without you my life would be crap. Nothing. Zilch. Nada. Zero. Invisible. Absolutely boring. Thank you. No, really, thank you. Thank you so much for all you have done for me. Thank you for being you, you perfect person you, you perfect human being person you, THANK YOU. Thank you from the bottom of my heart, the top of my heart and everything around my heart, everything inside my heart, thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you…so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so, so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so (she loses her breath, gasps for air but regains control after a quick cough) ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so ,so……..MUCH. You are remarkable. A gem. Special. Generous. Beyond words. Beyond what is beyond and then, what is even beyond that. An angel, a saint…you are Godlike. Really, no, no…you are the most wonderful creature ever created to exist on planet Earth.
Thank you. Just thought you should know…thanks again…thank you. Truly. (whispers) Thank you. (points)You. You. (softest whisper) Thank you. (mouthing the words) Thank you.